Whenever something crazy happens to me, for some reason, I always think of the scene in HOOSIER’s when Jimmy says that he thinks that he should start playing ball again. I dont know why that always plays in my head, and usually the situations don’t even call for it, but the way the scene unfolds and how happy everyone is when Jimmy decides to lace em up for Hickory High, gives me the idea that when shit is on the brink of going off a cliff, its time to get back to what you know.
That doesnt make any sense, I know, but I’ll give you a little bit of a window why it does right now. I took some L’s this weekend. Its been bad. Nothing that will end the world. Nothing that will effect anyone else but me. But they were a couple of major L’s. Makes you think about life type of shit. The type of stuff when you are alone driving in the car, you think to yourself, “what the fuck is wrong with you bro?”
To be honest with you, I kind of dont know how I got from point A to point B to point C of these situations, I just know that sitting here, right now, that it was an L. In hindsight, the reality of the why’s of it, arent even important. The harder thing for me to reconcile how to fix this shit. In the grand scheme of things, I’ve actually taken a lot of L’s in the last couple of years. Again, nothing that is going to change the world and probably nothing that even some of my closest friends would recognize, but for me, personally, its shit piling up that is killing me softly. There are only so many stomach punches that a cat can take before the body is so weak that one more shot, anywhere and maybe not as serious, but its still lights out.
As I look back over my last decade or so of life, there needs to be a couple of things going for me to be happy and to be running on all cylinders. I need my money situation to be right. My work life and my money needs to be right. I need to be doing something passionate that gives me an outlet or something to look forward to when work is gettin on my last nerve. I need to be in shape. And I need female companionship. Not necessarily a wifey or anything like that, but I need someone that I’m looking forward to spending time with on a regular basis.
In case you wanted to check out the scene.
So lets bring this home and figure out what Jimmy from Hoosiers and what P90X has to do with this, because who knows what the hell I am talking about in that paragraph above.
Work / life / money situation right now, is great. I couldn’t be happier actually. I’m super busy, but there is nothing killing me on that front.
For me, in my mind, the other two things is where I am lacking and those two things, to me, are inextricably linked. If I’m not in the shape or decent shape, the ladies situation is not going to be right. The thing is, that is totally in my head. And I know it. But for some reason in all of my years, I still havent gotten to the point where I know that most of the male-female dynamic doesnt reeeeeally have a ton to do with it, but it does. For me, its more of a confidence thing. If I’m not right, I think I look some type of way that isnt right, so I get in my head and the ladies stuff is wavy. I still get girls but not the ones I want. Thats a whole different thing that I wont go in to right now. but anyways, long story short, I need to get my ass in shape. Time to break out the P90X’er! I’ll let you know how this goes by next week.